Random Musings

What’s apparent is hidden

My Outlook crashed. It would not download any new e-mails. I was happy at least that I had not lost any of my other e-mails and contacts.  And, no, I had not backed up in a while. In fact I had just gotten an external hard drive, but not yet figured out how to use it.  I am not a techno-wizard.  A call to tech support gave me no answers at all.  Going into Microsoft Help was no help.  Finally I called my friend over to help me out. Toby is a techno-wizard, a Grand Wizard.  Within minutes my problem was solved.  “You had the program running twice.”  This was impossible, I only saw it once. How could this be?  He showed me a hidden list of programs that were running in the background.  So many – no wonder my computer is slow.  Quickly he deleted, clicked and moved files around into their proper place.  Next he moved everything important onto my new hard drive.  Fixed. Quickly. Done.  Whew!

This has left me wondering how much of our lives could be fixed if only we knew where to look for the hidden problem.  Wouldn’t it be wonderful to have a Wizard come and show us where the slow down is?  What faulty thoughts and triggers are we running unconciously.  Imagine how much better we would run if we could clear out these old tapes and bring the hidden files into the light where we could work on them.  Wish I could be fixed as easily as my computer.

Who is Israel Bissell and why should we care?

Saw an old HBo documentary about this man last night – Robert Wuhl’s comedy special from 2006 – and the facts about Paul Revere’s ride will surprise you.  Google Israel Bissell and find out what your history teacher’s never told you.

If You Want to be Happy

Everyone wants to be happy. In fact the Declaration of Independence gives Americans the right to pursue happiness.  It is not guaranteed, but we can chart our own path to joy.  At times when our work becomes overwhelming, or in this economy underwhelming, we may feel stressed and unable to rise to the level of cheerful delight.  However we all know people that no matter the circumstances always seem to have a smile on their face and a joie de vivre. How do they get there and how can we achieve this same satisfaction in our days and allow this feeling to spill over into the work we do? Happy people have three qualities that other people don’t have: they know it, they show it and they grow it. (more…)

A Hand in the Dark

Imagine that you are in a small enclosed placed sitting on a cold, hard floor in total darkness.  The heat begins to climb as you wonder how you will be able to take a breath.  The fear begins to rise from within and all you can think about it how to escape.  And you are aware that you have put yourself into this place precisely because it scares you. (more…)

When The Holidays Are Not So Happy

The holiday season is not always greeted with happy anticipation.  Some families are faced with the realization that a loved one is no longer present to enjoy the celebrations.  The sadness overshadowing Thanksgiving, Christmas or Hanukkah makes it difficult to carry on as usual.  Grief does not go away just because the holidays arrive and, in fact, the feelings may intensify. (more…)

Feel Better Now: 6 simple steps to grief relief

I have studied and offered healing techniques to those who grieve as a way to help ease the daily pain that is the companion of loss. Recently life created the unwelcome opportunity for me to witness the power of this process from the inside out.  We all will suffer a loss during our lifetime.  Each loss carries with it different circumstances, but there are still some strategies we can use to help us cope and heal. (more…)

Ten Steps to Reducing Tension

It sneaks up on us at the most unexpected times. It doesn’t take much to send us there: an inappropriate comment from someone, too much to do and no energy to do it or a sudden flood of emotions welling up.   Your day is going smoothly and suddenly, when one thing throws you a curve ball, you begin to feel yourself getting tense.  The stress begins to build and your mind begins to look for ways to get out and lay on a beach somewhere.  While thoughts of Tahiti may be appealing, the reality is that you have only two choices – stress out or seek relief.  Try any of the steps below and watch the frustrations melt away. (more…)

Spiritual Toolbox

A riddle: Everyone has one.  It has taken your entire life to create. Yet you don’t always use it when you most need it.  What is it?  Your spiritual toolbox. (more…)

Business FUNdamentals: Putting Laughter to Work

Oscar Wilde wrote that, “Life is too important to take seriously.”  This is a concept that resonates with most of us in our industry.  Every day we are challenged to meet the emotional needs of our clients while balancing our business and financial needs.  We are pushed to tend to the piles of paperwork which seem to grow each time we pick up the phone.  At the same time we must truly practice the art of presence each time we meet with a family.  Our double edged sword is the knowledge that each day may contain the unexpected.  This keeps our professional life from becoming routine, yet also creates situations where having a plan for the day is impossible.  Many of us have experienced periods of stress where the workload of the gotta-do’s are not going to get done unless we stay late or get to the office early.  We work in an industry where the time clock is never punched and there is no such thing as a true day off as long as you remain in your city.  And the strange thing is: we would not have it any other way.  This industry gets into our blood.  There is immense satisfaction in knowing that we are able to help our clients at the worst moment of their life.  We work in a field that most people avoid even thinking about, much less face each day: death.   Yet, for us, there is simply no better way to make a living.   (more…)

Laughter in the Face of Tears

The above title may seem inappropriate to some. “Death is not funny,” you might think.  The idea of laughing at a time of loss seems antithetical to the emotional upheaval that you may be feeling.  Yet in a recent collaborative study that investigated the relationship between laughter and grief, we found that it is perfectly understandable to laugh at a time when you least feel like it.  The healing benefits encompass body, mind and spirit and help to ease the pain.    (more…)

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